Alan Howling 'Laud' Hope

Statement to voters

We can confirm that our glorious leader Alan “Howlin” Laud Hope with selected agents will be standing against Andy Burnham in the forthcoming election in Makerfield. We can also confirm that there is no intention to launch a leadership bid to replace our leader. We can also confirm that we will be making every effort to win this seat and will be throwing everything at it. This election has come about so that Andy Burham will be eligible to mount a leadership bid against Sir Keir Starmer. However with the help of the voters in Makerfield we can cause a major upset in Labour rebels plans. Lets be honest here, this election has nothing to do with the aspirations of the Voters, they are being used as a pawn to change the Labour leadership , not to raise issues of importance to the constituents of Makerfield. Josh Simmons said in his election speech ” I will be your MP, your voice, and your advocate. My door will always be open. Tonight is the beginning of a mission”. He didn,t say “except if someone else comes along who needs my seat” Not to mention the people of Manchester who now will need a new mayor, so this exercise in “Game of Thrones” will cost the people of Manchester and Makerfield a lot of upset..watch this space!!

Election history

Westminster general elections